Enjoy…
Quick survey for all the ladies out there:
1. Does it bother
you that Republicans think you're too stupid to know how to make your own
health care decisions and that your decisions need to be legislated by
non-medically professional men?
2. Does it bother
you that Republicans think you serve no other purpose than to shut up, stay
home, cook, clean and make babies, you silly, feather-brained, 1950’s women?
Have my brandy
and slippers ready when I get home tonight. And make sure the kids are quiet.
I’ve had a long, difficult day. You wouldn’t understand. And dinner better be
ready at 6:30 sharp. And if you’ve done everything to my satisfaction, I’ll
give you a little spending money and you may leave the house tomorrow and treat
yourself to a nice dress or something. I know how you love your little clothes
shopping adventures, dear.
* * * *
This occurred to
me:
Republicans and
FOX "News" insist that because Reverend Wright said "God damn
America," and Barack Obama went to his church for 20 years, obviously that
means Obama also thinks "God damn America." Why else would he go to
that church if he didn't believe the same thing?
By this rule that
Republicans and FOX "News" invented, that would also mean that
Catholics all sexually molest young boys. Obviously it's true, since hundreds
and hundreds of Catholic Priests all over the world have been caught doing it.
Why else would Catholics go to church if they didn't believe the same thing?
That's the
problem with the faulty logic of "guilt by association." It can be
applied to anything at any time.
And obviously, I
must love Star Wars Episodes 1, 2 & 3 because I love episodes 4, 5 & 6.
And "guilt
by association" is shredded.
* * * *
God has
personally told every single one of the Republican candidates to run for
President except Mitt Romney. That god has a twisted fuck sense of humor.
* * * *
And this sign inspired this thought:
Annoy a
Conservative: Without personal gain, help someone other than yourself.
* * * *
Please stop
quoting the Bible for the reasons we should and should not do things. No matter
what quote you repeat, I can find at least twelve other contradictory quotes.
At the very least, I can find 100 things in there that you choose to ignore
that you don’t like – you fucking self-righteous hypocrite.
* * * *
"Six months
before this thing got going, every Republican I know was saying, 'We're gonna
win, we're gonna beat Obama.' Now, even those who've endorsed Romney say, 'My
god, what a fucking mess.'" - Ed Rollins, former Reagan campaign manager
in New York Magazine
* * * *
Vomit-prone Rick
Santorum said that he got lower grades at Penn State because the liberal
professors didn’t like his conservative-valued reports. “I can tell you
professor after professor who docked my grades because of the viewpoints I
expressed and the papers that I wrote. There’s no question that happened – I
used to go to war with some of my professors, you know, who just thought I was
just out of the pale and, you know, these ideas are just not proper ideas. And
got docked in communicating them.”
Docked his grades? How does that work? Your
answers were correct, Ricky, but your conservative values offend my liberal
beliefs, so I’m going to dock your grade two levels from A to B+.
Bob O’Connor, a
political science professor who taught four of Santorum’s classes said, “He
really has a rich fantasy life… I resent this sort of accusation [that] I and
my colleagues graded students on the basis of their political attitudes.
Ridiculous.”
Former Republican
Representative from Florida, Tom Feeney, a classmate of Santorum’s said, “He
had Republican values, but it’s not like he was running around leading
conservative jihads or anything.”
And as for his Über-Conservativeness,
Rick Santorum said in Philadelphia Magazine in 1995, “I was basically
pro-choice all my life, until I ran for Congress.”
The problem with
making shit up when there are witnesses (and print and video) is that they will
let everyone know you are making shit up. And I’m sure his lower grades had
nothing to do with his lower intelligence. It was all a Liberal’s fault.
But what do you
expect from a frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter?
* * * *
For the 10 years
in Pennsylvania between 2001 & 2011, there were nineteen (19) total votes
regarding abortion. An average of less than 2 per year. In the ONE year since the Teabagger Republicans took
control of the House, there were THIRTY-FUCKING-FOUR (34) votes on abortion. 34 in 1 year. Eat shit,
Republicans. Or, rather, go teabag yourselves.
* * * *
Andrew Breitbart
died early this morning.
*
* * *
And
Justin Bieber turned 18 today.
*
* * *
See?
Republicans are right. If we had just gotten rid of the EPA, then this report
would never have come out and corporations would be able to continue poisoning
us without hindrance to their profits.
Not
that anyone is stopping them. The country is still run by corporations as
opposed to the will of the people. It's just that their poisoning has officially
been documented now. Fracking officially fracks our health and safety. Drill
away, douchebags.
Drill
away.
$
> :-[
* * * *
Mitt Romney is
for against whatever you just said.
* * * *
Republicans
describe Ronald Reagan in as much a mythical holy way as they do Barack Obama in a mythical evil way. By today’s standards, Republicans
would actually consider Ronald Reagan a communist.
* * * *
Hey, Republicans.
You know what is the opposite of 'conservatism?' Assaulting women's health
care. Preventing Medicare for all. Preventing contraception. Banning gay
marriage. Forcing your religion upon everyone. Rewriting American history to
fit your wishes. Forcing the government between a woman and her doctor.
Stripping union rights. Preventing people from their Constitutional right to
vote. Calling education 'elitist.' Building walls between countries. Thinking
science is stupid. Forcing Americans to carry 'proof of citizenship' papers.
Cutting funding for the EPA, CDC and a slew of other agencies aimed at health,
safety and welfare in order to give tax breaks to the wealthy for no reason.
Gridlocking all legislation and manufacturing pointless fiscal emergencies.
No. Those things
are not conservative. They have no relation to your alleged claims of doing
everything in the name of 'freedom' in any way. In fact, they increase the size
of government. Increase regulation. Increase spending. Increase borrowing.
Increase the deficit. Increase debt. They create the very huge, expensive,
overbearing, suppressive government that you purport to hate.
No. These things
are not conservative. By definition, they are anti-American,
anti-Constitutional. They are Fascist.
I’ve heard the
theory that there are now two Conservative wings of the Republican Party.
There’s the Fiscally Conservative wing, which is concerned with small
government, less regulation and less spending. Then there’s the Socially
Conservative wing, which is concerned with demanding that everyone live their
personal lives according to a hugely false and misguided interpretation of the
Bible. It’s a fair theory except for one thing – the Fiscally Conservative wing
isn’t the slightest bit fiscally conservative. Almost every legislative
proposal they come up with will end up immediately, or in the long run, costing
vast amounts of unnecessary spending. So, what we really have, is a (pseudo)
Fiscally Conservative wing, which is concerned only with saving money for the rich, but drive up the cost of everything for
rest of the 99% of the country. Then there’s the Socially Conservative wing,
which are religious zealots demanding nothing good for modern 21st
century needs and values. And the (pseudo) Fiscally Conservative wing gloms onto
the rhetoric of the Socially Conservative wing just to use the brainwashing
aspect of religion to control the mindless, obedient hordes. It’s a mutually
beneficial symbiotic relationship – for a really small group of Americans.
All in all, you
are nothing but a loud, bullying minority that proclaims one of the many
magical sky fairies is on your side so your way is the right way. And that the
rich minority needs to be wealthy so the rest can get a trickle of your scraps.
Which has NEVER happened. You deem everyone to be too stupid to know what is
right for them, so you attempt to force your own personal beliefs upon the
masses - even though your own personal beliefs concern only 1% of the country or they are over 2,000 years old and haven't
progressed a bit since then.
I have news. The
world has grown over the past two millennia. It no longer believes in your
archaic notions of civilization. You willingly live in the ignorant, dust
covered past.
Yet, this
ignorance somehow gives you a righteous arrogance.
You are wrong.
The 99% are
right.
Go fuck yourself.
* * * *
Good day.
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