It seems if you really want to make a lot of money easily these days, target gullible, scientifically illiterate people by scaring them with pseudoscience or straight up anti-science and say the words “natural,” “organic” and/or “healthy” as often as possible.
Gluten-free (except for 1% of Earthlings)
Oh, and I love fast food. I just don’t eat it like a cafone. Yeah, I’m about to go after the giant heap of anti-science crap that is better known as “Super Size Me.”
The entire premise of Morgan Spurlock’s documentary, “Super Size Me” is pseudoscience bullshit. But he sprinkled it with real health information which was irrelevant to his "experiment." Sprinkling your bullshit with real science lends it an air of credibility, but it's still just bullshit with sprinkles on top. Let’s sift through it, shall we?
His “experiment” had rules.
*Eat only McDonald’s food for three meals a day, every day for one month.
*If he was offered a super sizing of his order, he had to accept it.
*He had to finish every bite of the food. No leftovers.
He also had to try at least one of everything on the menu by the end of the month and walk the average amount an American walks in a day, but these are irrelevant.
Spurlock began his “experiment” with the idea that fast food IS unhealthy and intentionally designed his rules to PROVE it. Barring the fact that it was already well known that foods high in calories, salt, fat and grease is not healthy, the scientific way would have been to ASK if fast food is unhealthy and design a non-biased experiment to FIND OUT if that was the case. Water is good for you, right? If I only drank water three times a day, every day for a month, sometimes to the point of vomiting, how healthy do you think I’d be? Dose, fucker. Dose.
First, NOBODY eats anything, let alone McDonald’s, three times a day, every day for a month, so I don’t understand how that has anything to do with proving anything. If the experiment tests something that nobody does, how can it be accurate? Where is the science in this?
Second, if people are offered a super sizing of their meal and they don’t want it, they say no. How does this this rule pertain to anything even remotely scientific? Again, an experiment not based in reality.
And finally, due to his “must eat everything” rule, Spurlock occasionally ate to the point of vomiting. Nobody, and I mean fucking NOBODY continues to eat after they are full and begin to vomit. How the fuck is this supposed to be teaching us something? (There may be people who force themselves to continue eating even after vomiting, but I would consider that a psychological disorder and not under the purview of Spurlock’s documentary or my subsequent evisceration of it.)
Spurlock forced himself to overeat unhealthily for a month, something nobody goes out of their way to do, became overweight and gained a bunch of medical problems as was inevitably the pre-ordained outcome, and proclaims, “See? Eating unhealthy makes you unhealthy! Thanks for the $22 million in ticket sales on my $65 thousand cinematic fearmongering film, gullible people.”
When you start with an outcome and work backward, manipulating all of your actions to prove that outcome is true, that is not science. That is pseudoscience.
On the flip side, there’s Mark Haub, a professor of human nutrition at Kansas State University. For two and a half months, he only ate Twinkies, Oreo cookies, Doritos and other high-calorie junk food products. The result? He lost 27 pounds and remained fairly healthy. Why? He made sure to burn more calories than he consumed. Now, even though this diet was horrible and most certainly would have led to health problems if sustained, this was more of a scientific experiment than Spurlock’s bullshit. And although both Spurlock’s and Haub’s theatric experiments functioned on outcomes that were already known, Haub wasn’t trying to scare you with pseudoscience, he was trying to educate you with science.
LA Times: A Twinkie diet? It comes down to calories
Cut Scene From The Original Star Wars: A New Hope
Ha ha. French Star Wars Disco gets 'em every time.